Back to blogging...and running.

Since my writing skills are deteriorating quickly, I have decided to revive this sucker to keep my mind alive and my fingers active. This blog was for a class project that I'm now taking over as my own. Another thing I've recently come back to is running. I used to be a runner, but never a runner that really enjoyed the act of running and felt incomplete if I skimped on my workout. I haven't run regularly since I quit cross country my senior year of high school so I could work more. That was six years ago. There is a real difficulty in motivating myself in most aspects of my life, but especially in working out. Having a coach made staying fit in high school relatively easy. I respond well to someone telling me what I need to do, how fast I need to do it, and what is utterly unacceptable. It seems I am very good at convincing myself I am trying as hard as possible while giving it about 50%.

Though I'm still battling with pace, I think I'm at least back in the groove. I'm working through a couch to 10k program and am partway through the second week. Not much of an accomplishment, but for me, it's something. But already I feel like I'm too excited...Like I feel too proud of what I've done. I look at the distance I traveled and I think, "yeah, I ran 2 miles today!" but really I ran and walked 2 miles. Which is better than nothing, but my real fear is that once this isn't as easy I will give up. I really want to push through this program and knowing that I am signed up to run the Warrior Run in June and am slated to run in a triathalon with friends in August make it necessary that I get into shape.

This may sound stupid and juvenile, but I've also realized that I do not have to be the person I want to be in this moment. That is, simply making small steps toward attainable goals that lead me to one day be the person I want to be is good enough. I spend so much time and energy being sad and angry that my plans for life are derailed that I get even more sidetracked from my goals. No longer! I am determined to make small changes until they add up and not be disappointed when I fall off the wagon. Anywho, in a New Years fashion, this years goals:

1. Get in better shape

2. Eat better/learn to cook. These are intrinsically tied.

3. Make strides toward becoming a better candidate for PA school and work hard on Plan B or C or whatever plan we are on now.

4. Volunteer more

5. Be happier. I used to be such a happy person, even at work but I'm finding myself very jaded as of late. It needs to change.

6. Make at least one new friend and have them over for dinner with my new cooking skills.

They seem pretty attainable, right?